Fun Times

Posted by Simes at 2:17 am
Nov 052007

The Quicktime plugin keeps crashing Firefox so I finally install that iTunes update I’ve been putting off for ages (largely because Apple’s update software for Windows doesn’t work). There are pending Windows updates, so while I have all the windows closed anyway I reboot to do them.

On reboot, nTune hangs the machine until it is killed. The Windows update goes through. iTunes gives an error about not being installed correctly. I reboot again. The POST hangs at “detecting IDE devices”. I reset a couple of times trying to sort it, and finally yank the cable from my iPod because I’m convinced it is the cause of the delay. USB support disappears from my machine altogether and the POST hangs with a “keyboard not present” error. This problem persists through several power-cycles. The air is rent with cursing.

I find a PS/2 keyboard and get my machine to boot again. Once Windows loads, USB support magically returns and all my USB devices light up, including the keyboard. nTune hangs the machine until it is killed. I reinstall iTunes. It gives the same error. Another Windows update arrives. I search for the error in the Apple software forums. Apparently iTunes doesn’t install the correct drivers under x64 Windows. Why the fuck not, thinks I. I reboot again. nTune hangs the machine until it is killed. I uninstall nTune. I find, download and install the supposedly correct drivers for iTunes. It has no noticeable effect, as iTunes still gives the same error. As the error doesn’t actually stop iTunes from playing music or syncing my iPod, I decide to go to bed.

Apple annoyed me the most today, largely because they seem to throw their Windows software together without a great deal of care. Their automatic update software has never worked for me, and while iTunes has drivers for ripping CDs under XP x64 (I know this because my iTunes used to be able to do it) they don’t seem to bother making sure the installer does the right thing.

I know they can do software right. My Macs are evidence of this. Why don’t they do it for all of their software?

For Your Consideration…

Posted by Simes at 12:27 am
Oct 182005

Here is the body text of a document I received through the post this weekend. I present it here, and my response to it, for your consideration (emphasis mine):

…the Contractor shall be required to make themselves available to perform the Services as and when required by the Client in an arrangement known as “Standby”. Where the Contractor is required to be on Standby at the instruction of the Client, the Company shall pay the Contractor a fixed fee known as the “Standby Fee” of 1 hour multiplied by the Contractor’s standard hourly rate. For Contractor’s (sic) on a daily rate, this shall be a calculated hourly rate of the daily rate divided by 7.5 hours. The Standby Fee will be based on sessions; one session will be applicable to any period of time outside normal hours of work, ie 09:00 to 17:30, Monday to Friday. At weekends and Bank Holidays, one session will be applicable to each non-working day, ie 00:00 to 23:59. If the Contractor is then required to perform services at the request of the Client, whilst the Contractor is on Standby, the Contractor will be paid for the actual hours worked. For the avoidance of doubt, the Contractor shall be paid both the Standby Fee and for the actual hours worked in these circumstances.

In summary:

“The client has absolute power over your free time, and can demand that you sit by the phone for an entire weekend – all 48 hours – in exchange for two hours’ rates.”

Nice of them to get the word “request” instead of “instruction” in at the end there. Maybe they missed that one in proofreading.


You can probably predict the nature of my response, but I include it here anyway, for completeness:

I was somewhat surprised to have this drop through my door on Saturday morning, particularly as that was how I discovered that there were any plans at all to amend my contract. Having checked with several of the team today, it seems that they were just as surprised as I was to have received their own copy of this document.

Upon actually reading it, of course, my surprise rapidly turned to disgust. I find it hard to believe that Penta would have agreed on my behalf to such an insultingly low weekend standby rate, and yet here is the evidence in front of me in black and white. On top of that this document gives the client absolute power over my free time, and my response to *that* is probably best left unsaid.

*If* I wanted to work the weekends, which I don’t, but if I did, this is the kind of thing I would expect: A standby rate of 0.5x my usual rate for normal office hours, and 1.5x my usual rate for outside of those hours, and for any hours worked, 1.5x my usual rate on top of that. Because if I’m going to be giving up my weekend it had damn well better be worth my while.

And that brings us on to the word “require”. There is no way I’m signing up to anything where I am “required” to work weekends. Even if the wording was “requested” instead, there is no indication of the amount of notice the client is required to give me.

I thought the purpose of an agency was to work on behalf of both the client *and* the contractor? After all, it’s my rates you’re taking a percentage from. With the arrival of this document I have to wonder what it is I’m actually paying you for.

Needless to say, I will not be signing this amendment. I look forward to an explanation as to how things even got this far.

Simon Brown
Vector Solutions Ltd.

Diabolical Horrendous Lackwits

Posted by Simes at 8:33 pm
Jun 242005

Impatiently wondering just where it is my lovely package from amazon.co.uk has got to, I log into the DHL parcel tracker web site, look it up, and am greeted with this:

THE LIES! THE LIES!

Now, you can probably already guess how many cards I have actually discovered on my doormat from them, but just so we’re clear: NONE.

NOT. A. SINGLE. ONE.

So where the hell are they “leaving” them? Wedged into the doorframe of the building (I have seen this) so that the instant anyone who lives in any of the other three flats uses the door, the card falls out and disappears? Tucked neatly into the flower baskets hanging either side of the door? SATURN?

Useless bastards, the lot of them.

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